In this short writeup, I want to share a powerful skill that I was forced to learn when I was dead broke
This is the skill of getting people to like you fast…and help you out as a result.
Because of this skill, I can meet someone for the first time and get them to really like me (that is if I like you though because I intentionally limit my circle of people. So I usually put up my “No BS shield” most of the time)
And because of this skill, I usually avoid certain situations with women because I usually end up getting into trouble when the woman begins to develop feelings.
Please, do not use this for bad purposes.
To make you understand how powerful this skill is and how to use it, let me tell you a story.
Back in 2006, I used to be dead-shy and awfully quiet.
I am still quiet but I have developed myself to do anything I want to do these days.
Anyway…I was in school then with a pocket money of N2000 a month which wasn’t enough.
Yet, I wanted to learn how to do business online which required that I spend a lot of time on the internet. The problem was…I needed money to pay at the cybercafe or to get a modem
So, I figured that if I could be friends with the guys at the cybercafe, they would actually help me with free browsing time.
But how would a shy, quiet guy do that.
I had been studying human behaviour for sometime starting from Dale Carnegie’s bestselling book – “How to win friends and influence people”
That book is powerful by the way.
From what I knew at the time about human behaviour, I knew that all human beings have what I call hidden addictions.
These are called hidden addictions because people don’t really know they have these addictions.
When you help people to satisfy these addictions, you can become more than their business associates or acquaintances. You can become more like family.
There are 10 of these hidden addictions but let me tell you about 3 which are:
(1) People silently desire to be respected.
(2) People need to be noticed and feel understood.
(3) People want to feel important.
If you can genuinely fulfill those 3 things, you can quickly develop powerful relationships with people
Take the desire to be respected for instance, people usually lack respect for others and I am not talking about the Sir/Ma fake type of respect.
I think everyone deserves some level of respect even if they seem to be “under” you.
Or the need to be noticed and feel understood.
A lot of men easily lose their women just because of this alone.
One of the ways I apply this is to “simply listen” to people I am interested in with full attention and make them feel important.
And knowing that we human beings are selfish, I usually stop thinking about myself and think of you with full attention.
One of the very simple ways to make people feel important for instance is remembering their names and pronouncing it in a special way.
At the cybercafe, I will start conversations and listen to these guys talk about their ambitions, problems, desires etc
This is powerful because majority of people are so selfish and don’t know how to listen to others
Being a quiet person, listening to people is the easiest thing for me to do but anyone can also do it.
By the way, this might not work really well if you are a lying smuck.
People have an innate ability to detect bullshit.
I genuinely respect people regardless of their levels (except for people who make it known that they don’t deserved any respect)
So, when I listened to the guys at the cybercafe, it was genuine.
I simply gave them the type of respect they silently need as human beings.
I made them feel important and understood.
Before you know it, I made friends with all the staff at the cybercafe and I got unlimited free browsing access.
It didn’t end there.
I was even making some extra money because they will pay sometimes to help them with a few things.
In case you are thinking this is just luck, I didn’t do this at just one cybercafe.
I did the same thing at two other cybercafes.
And I have done the same thing to develop relationships with various people since then.
When you get better at this, you will be able to detect which of the hidden addictions is stronger for someone than the others and you can focus on that.
Anyway…I have to go.
If you want to learn more, I believe Dale Carnegie’s book is a good place to start.
Hope this helps.